Welcome to “Your Amazing Life” and thanks for being here. We discuss tools and tricks to create an Amazing Life in this Blog. There are a few powerful ways you can support us. You can help by subscribing and leaving a rating/ review, in it leave your top takeaways from what we talked about, also interact with the community on the Facebook page. Next, be a hero to your friends and family and share it with them… Lastly, sponsor it. Your support makes a massive difference. Check out the show notes for links to the subjects we discuss and if you have any topics, you would like me to address just put it in the private Facebook group. I want to give a couple shout outs first to Gabriel341213 for leaving a review. I’m so glad you are enjoying this Blog and to my Florida Tribe. Thank you for sharing it with your friends and family. Let’s get into Your Amazing Life.
I am not afraid of storms for I am learning how to sail my ship. Louisa May Alcott. So, let’s break this down. On a beautiful calm day, sitting on the water in a sailboat how do you make the boat do anything? It would be a frustrating waste of time. Then the bigger the boat you want to move, the bigger the breeze you need. We need to learn to use different tools for the same wind. Sometimes we may need to tack to move in the direction we want to go. Storms are needed to sharpen skills and practice your abilities to manage systems. When storms are around it is a great time to learn how to handle the conditions. So, we need not fear challenges. Challenges are what helps us to learn and grow. So many people have a fear of the challenges. Fear can stop us before we start. We may not even get on the sailboat due to our fears. But we can never learn to sail nor ever get better at sailing if we don’t face the storms.
Challenges are part of most cultures. They can come in the form of dares or as rites of passage. It wasn’t until the last couple of generations that we started trying to shield our kids from challenges. This is not working well. Imagine how bland life would be without challenges. If we were given everything without challenge there could be no climbing, no fixing things, no sports, or competition. We would not even be able to establish relationships. It would be like eating macaroni and cheese for every meal. 3 times a day 7 days a week! I would be done with that soooo fast. I don’t care if it is a wonderful mac and cheese. I would hate that.
One of our foster kids had been treated like this at home. Their parents would not let them learn things. They could cook for fear that they might cut themself or burn something. They couldn’t mow the lawn, or ride a bike. The parents had this long list of things they couldn’t try. They couldn’t even decide who to be friends with. This stunted their growth. Kept them acting younger than they were. This side effect was one they liked made them be the baby longer. But the problem was this child was not being prepared for life. They would have to be reliant on someone else forever. This stunted growth and created special needs. They train the child to not accept challenges. They trained them to not look at how to sail. It is so sad. It causes so many problems in the kids’ life. They then have to be retrained to accept challenges, and to challenge themselves. It is a trick to learn to manage comfort levels within challenges. But taking challenges for our kids rob them of self-confidence and growth.
Why might you not want a challenge? Challenges can result in failure; this can bring on feelings of disappointment, shame, embarrassment, or humiliation. On the flip side it can result in success; bringing on awareness of honor, praise, pride, and dignity. Worry is merely sustained fear caused by indecision. So, if you are concerned use Brian Tracy’s “The Worry Buster.” Step one, define the situation clearly in writing. Many times, the problems can be solved by defining them clearly. Step two, now determine the worst possible outcome. Here again write it down, writing it is important. Otherwise, it will morph and change and you will not get the worst out. Step three is to accept the worst should it occur. Once you accept what is to be your mind will become clear and calm. Step four Is to take action. Do whatever is possible to improve upon the worst. To overcome worry it takes purposeful action. If you make yourself busy doing something about the situation you will lose the worry. Action will give you confidence, courage and a sense of control.
The thing about life is “If it doesn’t challenge you, it doesn’t change you.” Like we talked about in episode #165 with Sara Blakely you can rethink your story about failure. Just like her father helped her to reframe the idea of failure into not trying something. Whether or not you want challenges depends on your story of what are the consequences to the challenges. The definition of failure and your story about it can be changed. You cannot achieve success if you never attempt things. You have the ability to determine the power that failure and success have in your life. You can increase the power of success and decrease the power of failure. If you did not fear rejection if it had no power how would today be different what would you do differently? Rejection is a part of life, It happens to all of us and it means only what meaning we give it. Be true to yourself, this can take courage. There will be times others will be disappointed. But live and act for yourself and not for others. Build confidence in overcoming challenges. Challenges bring on stories, stories bring on emotions, The emotion that you tie to the story is the thing you are trying to avoid. Change your story to want to bring on challenges. I can help you manage your story and expectations so that you can be in control and feel better about taking on challenges.
In our next blog we will be talking about “The one-hundred-year-old lesson that is still true tune in tomorrow to find out what the lesson is! …
I want each of you to know I appreciate each and every one of you. I’m grateful that you are spending your time with me today so we can develop this friendship. You mean a lot to me. I know you have overcome some really tough things to get here. Like I said at the beginning there are a few things you can do to help, if this message has been helpful today, please share it with a friend or family member who may need to hear it. Or sponsor it. If you haven’t yet, please subscribe to this podcast and leave a rating and review. Also join the Facebook Group or to set up a time to talk with me so we can discuss how you can use these tools and others to get your amazing life!